Freedom, Part 2: A Different Take
The 4th of July used to be my favorite holiday; when I was a kid, the parade in Ashland was legitimately wild and amazing. Creative, weird, colorful, and diverse. Classic cars and people on shiny Harleys and music everywhere. A bunch of guys named Bob (they were, literally, just “The Bobs”) who would dress up and carry lawn chairs and just post up in the street occasionally or do funny skits. People dancing and horses prancing and high school athletes tossing candy into the crowd. And the flyover to kick everything off! The parade felt like it was hours long with almost no gaps between floats/teams/acts. I would have to confirm this, but I don’t remember there being a lot of political antics outside the mayor waving from the back of an old convertible. Then at night, there was a fireworks show that just felt like it went on forever. So epic! It was a truly joyful experience, and of course I was too young to be thinking about the fraught implications of celebrating our independence while we participated in the oppression of people at home and abroad, and while many people in this country were and are not truly free.
In my late teens and twenties, the 4th was a chance to run into a lot of people I hadn’t seen in a while. Ashland is a small town and lots of people come home for the 4th; especially in the 5-8 years after high school, my friends and I made a point of coordinating daylong hangouts, parties, BBQs, and general hijinks. This was a time when we also believed/convinced ourselves that it was socially accepted to start drinking early. There were times in my life – especially during the summer – where that felt like a plus, and my friends and I “made the most of it.” In retrospect, I can’t say that I’m either proud or ashamed; it was not a healthy choice or an appealing practice, and it was also a lot of fun at the time. There was, for what we were doing, a certain kind of joy involved. What there was not a lot of was critical thought about the contradictions of what we were doing or the larger context of what was happening in the world.
At the time, we believed that we were embodying freedom, which to us meant doing whatever we wanted, with whoever we wanted, for as long as we wanted, and no one could tell us differently or take away that right because this is America! Unfortunately for my (mostly male) friends and I, we were really just a bunch of day-drunk idiots embodying a misunderstanding of what freedom truly means. Often, when the concept of freedom and patriotism get expressed in this country, they center around the idea that Americans – or some of us, more realistically, meaning “white, hetero, cis-gendered, affluent, and male” – hold a special place and privilege in the world order; with that comes the permission to behave however we like, and anyone who questions us is sub-human or an enemy. It’s very divisive, and so when we take our “American Way” out into the world (in terms of foreign policy/politics/globalization) what we are promoting is division and a scarcity mindset that says “there’s not enough,” that “there is only so much (love, wealth, respect, safety, rights, etc.) and so if you have some, I don’t.” We are inundated with an ideology of scarcity rather than an affirmation of abundance; this not only leads to so many of the world’s problems, it’s also just not true.
A solution, or the beginning of one, requires a few things:
1. Each of us to opt out of the noise – which can be very loud and persuasive these days if we let it in – and instead take on the challenge of thinking for ourselves. In what is at this point an almost-completely-connected world on the digital level – even as it becomes less connected interpersonally – information is simultaneously easier than ever to access, and more or less unregulated. We need to change how we take in and interpret information, relying more on honest observation, education, and heart-centered conclusion and less on what other people tell us to believe. This is called critical thinking; it challenges us to…
2. step into an internal space characterized by curiosity and as much emotional neutrality as we can muster. This is not a choice or a space that our mainstream culture encourages us to inhabit, perhaps it is because doing so means…
3. letting go of my tightly- or even desperately-held opinions (which are not the same as core values) and approaching what I see from a place of seeking understanding, a place of ‘not knowing.’ Where do my opinions come from? Why do I believe what I believe? Is this something that I think, or something I just heard and adopted? How does this opinion serve me in my life, and how does it help the people around me? Of course, human beings are inherently egoic, and in today’s hyper-individualistic social climate, humility is not exactly what are best at, so we also have to…
4. work at it, mindfully and with devotion, in a place of relative discomfort. Ouch. Except, the space of appropriate discomfort is the very place from which we grow; staying comfortable means staying stagnant, passive, and giving up control of my own life. Being an active participant in one’s own growth, and therefore that of humanity, requires each of us to…
5. change our commitment to convenience. Much of what we are being sold, commercially, politically, socially, morally – and patriotically – is based on the quickest and lowest-effort choices, the easiest and least uncomfortable for those of us with privilege while maintaining the ideals of scarcity, fear of otherness, and separateness.
The continued function of our systems as they have been constructed depends on us asking few, if any, questions, and many of us - although thankfully fewer each day - do just that. To me, that is the opposite of freedom.
Real freedom is being awake to reality, to the amazing and the awful and everything in between and knowing that fulfillment comes from living all of it. It is the freedom of thought and choice that comes from paying attention and understanding hard truths, context, and nuance, and seeing things as they are. Freedom is realizing that we need certain, equal boundaries so that EVERYONE can feel safe and included. Freedom means operating from a place of compassion and common humanity and giving up some things that we want so that everyone can have what they need. It is using privilege to elevate others. It is having the courage to try and fail when we’re unsure of the outcome; it is admitting when we’re wrong, saying we’re sorry, and then showing through action that we’ve learned something from that failure so that we may ado better the next time around.
True freedom is grasping the inescapable mutuality of our lives and our systems – the interconnectedness of everything – and aligning how we live with participation and commitment to those connections; it is also letting go of the expectations that we have for others and those that others have for us and working to improve the systems for all. It is understanding that just as I want to love, create, be, experience, and do the mundane things that make up life on Earth, so do most other people, and it is advocating for everyone’s human right to those beautiful, essential mundanities. It is not only doing what we want, when we want, with whoever we want, for as long as we want; true freedom also means exercising our most sacred gift, the gift of choice, to show restraint and NOT do those things when they only serve ourselves to the detriment of others, and instead to advocate for – and act on – what is right, ethical, and morally correct and in the highest good of all beings and the Earth.
I don’t want to step off this train of thought without stating that I am unequivocally grateful to live where I do. I know that no place is perfect, but my little town is closer to it than a lot of places on Earth, and my life is one of relative ease, safety, privilege, connection, education, and opportunity. It would be, if not easy, certainly more comfortable and convenient for me to just glide along and do the Standard American Thing. As much and as often as I can, I’m choosing to do the opposite; in order for me to do that, to bring what Light I can to the places I move through and try to be part of a systemic shift, I have to be awake in heart and mind.
Kobe Bryant once said that the most important question an athlete can ask is “Why?” As in, “why did that happen” or “why did I fail” or “why do I believe what I believe,” the implication being that I am seeking to understand and looking for a solution over which I have some control. Since athletes are people, this approach of critical thought, curiosity, humility, opportunity, and self-responsibility applies to us all. It, built on a foundation of gratitude, is the way forward.
Originally published on July 10, 2023